I love being a mother! Truth be told I love doing things for my son that is 12 years old more than I should, or more than what my mother was doing for me at 12. Taking care of him and doing things for him truly makes me happy. I don’t only enjoy cooking delicious meals for him I also enjoy making his plate, not only do I enjoy washing his clothes I enjoy folding putting them away and organizing his closet. I wake up early just to drive him 3 blocks to his bus stop, even when I’m talking ishh it gives me joy and purpose. But I’ve created not only a loving charming kid but an entitled one, that would take everything and leave me with nails. Maybe not really but that is how I feel, yes I have feelings even though I am an adult and a mother. I leave my house at 7am get in at 5:15, it’s currently football season with practice being at 5:45pm, five days per week until school starts which then changes it to three times per week. This means no breaks for me, starting at 7am until I return home at about 8:15pm.
The other day work kicked my ass and Muva decided I simply couldn’t do it all on this particular day. I was expecting my son who can’t even throw his Dunkin Donuts napkin in the trash by the way, for some understanding. What was I thinking?! What I received was disbelief that I was not about to suck it up and drag my tired ass to practice. I know the imperfection and love for me (insert the gasps). Our mothers or maybe it was just my mother believed in running herself ragged for her children, and sometimes they still weren’t satisfied (that would be me!). Even today’s society mothers are expected to do the impossible and look good and cheerful doing it. I have learned I am no good to anyone if I am no good to myself. It’s my job to take care of me regardless of what the situation or relationship and I take that very serious even with my son. The truth is we don’t only have to stand up for ourselves at work and with others but even in our home with the people we love and we give non tangible things. Your kids and spouse at times will keep taking as long as you keep giving. It doesn’t mean they are doing it in malice; it is what they have been accustomed to. Therefore there are days when I MUST stand up for myself and say I refuse to spread myself too thin. I can imagine how many of the women in my family before me that couldn’t even think that way without feeling guilty or ashamed. I don’t feel bad I actually I feel empowered. Being a priority in your own life isn’t limited to living out your wildest dreams that also includes a rough day. I had to remind my son (aka LET HIM KNOW LOL) I am human that also expects compassion and understanding. I explained to him it would be nice to receive that type of love, as well. After he looked at me as if there was something wrong with me he comprehended and the night was great. I helped bake his barbecue chicken (I punched all the way out of the clock lol) we watched the Trayvon Martin documentary and the night ended well. To all of my mamas out there doing the impossible day in and day out; there will be days when you need to take that damn cape off! I know we take pride in doing the impossible because I do get an unexplainable feeling when I pull the unimaginable off. But like Brie said on an episode of Total Divas Wonder Woman didn’t have any damn kids!!! LOL
Wishing you no pain unless its champagne!